Sunday, January 31, 2016

Cracker Dance

Nibble your way to enlightenment while moving to the music.

We have them all here: whole wheat (trigo integral), barley (cebada), oats (aveena), quinoa (trendy bits). Take your pick. Nibble away. Become all you can be. Join the Enlightenment Force. Sing and dance your way to happiness while enjoying healthy snacks.

Your Heavenly Facilitator this week (fresh in from St Tropez) will be Carla Venn Diagram, famous graphic artist, stylist, fashion statement, and Spiritual Guru ™, still almost warm from the sunny shores of that fabled little French village that has so much to teach us, the place where Carla VD as she likes to be known recently participated in celebrating the life of the town's patron saint, Torpe de Pizza, well known to the history books for his mozzarella breath and propensity to harvest intense sunburns while sleeping off lunch during long afternoon naps on the beach.

Which you can also do in Cuenca, but not this weekend, because this weekend, (This one only!) we're welcoming Dr. Carla VD and her famous instructional hand puppets to show us the way to enlightenment without any B.S. or need to suspend any disbelief whatsoever.

Yes, folks, it's Carla Venn Diagram: MSW, MFA, Ph.D., Transpersonal, body-centered psycho-spiritual therapist, registered expressive arts therapist, visual artist, dance and improv performer, comedian, and certified Picnic Party Consultant. And she's here for us. Just us. And anyone who can spring for the low-low admission fee of just $99.99 for a twelve-step, twelve-minute, hands on all singing, all dancing instructional session that will change your life forever while it lasts don't be late.

Trained in Action Theatre, Authentic Movement, and Body-Centered Expressive Movement, Dr. Carla studied with shamans and van dwellers and was certified by and worked with Stanislav von Graf (Spee) and Jackson (Jackie the Peanut) Smallnuts in Holotropic Breathwork and plant therapy. (She herself has single-handedly and without regard for her personal feelings or safety and with no need to ever mention it or seek recognition solely and alone among all the peoples of the world who have ever lived saved many radishes, carrots, rutabagas, and several ailing pumpkins to boot from serious depression, evil spirits, and leaf rot, so think what she can do for you.)

This week only at the Four Centered Rivers Center for the Creative Centered Arts — come one, come all. Come early and often. Only $99.99 while the spiritual energy lasts.

Just look for the door around the back of the gray and orange building between Ed's Spanish Recycling and the Good Eats Cuenca Weenie Hole.

Bring a friend with money and get your very own free aura tuneup and miracle brow-wiping cloth and if you have recycling to drop off, well Ed will be glad to see you too. We start on time and don't take kindly to laggards since we have appointments in a bunch of other gringo burgs all up and down the Gullible Coast and then we have to hop over the border into Peru before dark. Just so you know.

Please send an email to let us know you are coming, and how much money you plan to be carrying, and if you are armed. Thank you very much. See you there if not somewhere else.

True!

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