Thursday, August 20, 2020

Why I Don't Like The U.S. Any More

Why I Don't Like The U.S. Any More

Yeah, well, why would I?

Things are ugly there. People hate each other and themselves. You can't get anywhere without driving, even if you only want to cross the street.

I know. I was born there, grew up there, tried one thing and another, and finally left.

I didn't want to leave so much as to re-locate what I'd lost. Peace. Quiet. Safety. Community. Adventure. The ability to walk anywhere that I needed to go. Freedom from gunfire.

I saw the following today too: 15-minute cities are making a comeback Defined as "a 'complete neighborhood' that centers around the idea that residents can meet most of their daily needs by walking or bicycling a short distance — i.e., 15 to 20 minutes — from their homes."

This is a concept I've followed my whole life. Except for brief periods I was always able to walk to work. It saves a lot of time, and preserves sanity, besides giving your feet something to do twice a day.

And besides that, there is Steve Bannon was just charged with fraud and money laundering in a border wall scheme.

Right. Who needs that? Invent a pure movement, build it up, become righteous, then fuck your followers and suck them dry.

And that is only one item from one day of this week. Those items have been flying by in whole nasty flocks for close to four years now, with no inkling of an ending. And it was nearly as bad before that. It's only worse lately, not different.

Don't expect the next presidential election to put the flames out. Expect instead to see real flames, and rival gangs doing some shooting, along with state security police, even if they won't be called that, yet. I expect that the first crisis following the next presidential election to last at least two to three months. Then there will be severe turmoil for another year or two, assuming that there will be an end to all of it somewhere. But there may be no end, only an eventual tapering off as people and their systems gradually turn their attention to other things.

Things won't go back to normal soon. In fact, Things won't go back to normal ever. It will be one novel experience following the last, for time without end. What with current worldwide political and economic crises, global pollution and overheating, overpopulation, and the inevitable nuclear wars coming Real Soon Now, we will be living in Interesting Times™. Yep.

Good thing for me that I'm already old, so I won't have to see the worst of it, probably. I'm thinking now that the ideal time to have been born in the U.S. was between 1929 and 1939, assuming that one could have avoided the worst of the Great Depression. Assuming that, and a couple of other lucky breaks, I'd be dead by now, having benefited from the development of industrialism, a hydrocarbon economy, antibiotics, telephony, radio, television, and the beginnings of the computed society, but would definitely have avoided the current and soon-to-arrive global catastrophes.

If nothing else, the earth has too many humans. That alone would take us down. With a carrying capacity of about a billion humans at the best of times but an actual human population of 7.8 billion, we now have almost eight times as many humans in the neighborhood as it will support.

We're out on a limb, population-wise, and it's going to break off, no matter what. Boom.

The other stuff (global pollution, global heating, nuclear war, successive plagues and so on) are all gravy. Overpopulation will come charging at us first and is enough to do us in all by itself.

Meanwhile, I'm sitting here 2.54° south of the equator, in a mostly peaceful country, where I can afford to live a decent life, and watching the U.S. hit the wall. It's way over-extended, especially with its philosophy of pedal-to-the-metal hyper-individuality, and get-the-fuck-out-of-my-way, mother-fucker, or I'll shoot you.

Go ahead, good old boys. Boys. Yep. Boys and girls. Up there. Not here.

People are grown up here. No one has crossed the street to tell me how to live, or threatened to kill me. Last time I was in the U.S., someone threatened to shoot me, twice, within a couple of minutes, because he thought his dogs had a right to attack me in a public place and because he thought I didn't have a right to take exception.

Which is why i don't like the U.S. any more. Nuff said.

 


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Me? Wondering why that monkey has been following me around all week.

Sunday, June 7, 2020

Scatter

I'm headed into my eighth year associated with Ecuador. I'm an Associate Ecuadorian. But I still don't know poopy-poo.

Still un-housebroken, still rough around the edges, still mushy in the middle, I stick out like a sore thumb, a thore sumb, a prickly stub, a discarded butthead.

Recently it's been different here.

We're coming out of a long lockdown, a time when it was illegal to be out on the streets in search of anything other than medical care, pharmacy goods, bank cash, or food. And super double plus illegal to be out on the streets before 5 a.m. or after 2 p.m. And the Fuerzas Armadas were watching. Also the police (the regular, city police), and the transit police, and maybe the civil guard, and possibly the provincial police and quite likely also the national police.

At the hotel it was just Waleed and me, two spooks in the dark holding down the fort.

He'd go out early nearly every day, and I'd hold back, hitting the streets only to pull cash from an ATM, and to buy food. But then he speaks Spanish well for an Arab-Canadian, and I can't, because deaf. Nearly deaf. And I'll never become un-deaf so poo.

I don't know what-all he was doing outside every day, but I studied my Spanish upstairs on the "terrace" (the sort of verandah-thing where there is a view and where there is also warmth on sunny days). For exercise I'd hike laps from my apartment in the building behind, into the hotel, around the lobby, up and down the stairs, and back to my apartment. Five laps took around 10 minutes, and required heavy breathing, so it was good.

Pretty good. Better than only sitting, and I seem to have maintained my strength and most of my fitness, for now that I'm free again I can go anywhere and still do whatever it was I used to do without suffering.

But others have suffered.

The hotel staff is all gone. Let go. Unemployed. I feel for them.

Originally the shutdown was to be for two weeks. But it was a hard shutdown and lasted close to two-and-a-half months, and many businesses have now closed, and many people are still at loose ends. The world has disintegrated. Turned to chaff. Is blowing in the wind.

At least the hotel hasn't closed. At least this one has not. I still have a place to live and the owners are in, cleaning, refurbishing, and planning to reopen when they get customers. Which may be a while yet. Maybe two more months. Maybe three.

Too bad.

Too bad for many reasons, but I am glad to see the hotel still open because that way I still have a home, though I've been pulling cash from the machine and lining my nest with it in case. I can move out if I need to, in case, if there is another place still open, if I really need to move out.

And I've managed to share some of that cash with the former employees — a little here, a little there, as they come around. As I can find them. But I really hope that they can all come home soon and make this a living business again. And reverse at least some of the scatter.

 


Ever find a snake in your soup? Supposed to happen to everyone sooner or later.
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Sunday, May 31, 2020

Gringo Poem

Sandwiches to distribute to street people in need. Quito Second-hand offers excellent condition items.

Laptops, Canadian money and withdrawals, treadmill. Large dog, found near Feria Libre.

I'm looking for turmeric as a supplement or pill.

Danny's Computer Service. Is an End of Life document necessary?

Need your knives and scissors sharpened? The best New York cheesecake in Cuenca.

For sale, small couch, Peach-Skin Midnight Fantasy Comforter, Duglis.*

Brand-new disinfection trays for home or businesses. Stay safe and clean. Warmth and comfort. Desinfection alcohol and antibacterial gel. KN95 masks.

Recommendation for Diana Vera, facilitator. Are you in for a treat?

Craft beer: growlers and four packs.

Mexican food: tacos al pastor, gringas and more delicious options. Have you tried our bagels yet?

El Rey del Burrito, the best Mexican food. Nuts for delivery.

Cuchi Suco BBQ pit is back.

Cozy, fully furnished one-bedroom apartment with balcony. Sourdough bread.

 

* Footnotes. (This will be on the test.)

Question: I want to light my 4×2×2 with T5 and LED, and to mitigate cost I want to do a little DIY. I have three ideas and am looking for advice or reviews. — Duglis

 

Possible answers:

(1)  Are you Duglis the Immortal?

(2)  What type of name is Duglis?

  • I'm not sure
  • Boy's name
  • Girl's name
  • Boy's or girl's name
  • Last name or family name
  • Pet
  • Food
  • Pet food
  • Fet pood
  • Poopoo
  • You-know-who
  • Other (Example: How difficult is it to pronounce Duglis? Another example: Do you ever have pains in all the diodes down your left side?)

(3)  How unique is the name Duglis? Out of 6,028,151 records in the U.S. Social Security Administration public data, the first name Duglis was not present. It is possible the name you are searching has less than five occurrences per year.

(4)  Weird things about the name Duglis: Your name in reverse order is Silgud. A random rearrangement of the letters in your name (anagram) will give Isuldg. How do you pronounce that? Go ahead. Just try.

(5)  But again, I do not know how you feel about it, but you were a female in your last earthly incarnation. You were born somewhere around the territory of USA South-Central approximately on 750. Your profession was entertainer, musician, poet, and temple-dancer. You always liked to travel, to investigate, could have been detective or spy. You should develop self-love and ability to implant hope into hearts of people. Ambition is not everything. True wealth is buried in your soul. Dig for it, Babe. (Click to save the high quality version of yourself.)

 

Yes — "Desinfection." I don't know either.

 


Recently found lint on the ceiling. Didn't realize I was looking at the floor. All OK now.
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Thursday, May 28, 2020

Post Of The Wild Gringo

We present you with a win, win, win, today only, only, only.

Language exchange is looking for a Dr. that is a specialist in treating sciatica, and hopes to import my US stuff to EC.

But Albert, well...Albert is as Albert does, which is shipping belongings to US, and so looking for XL bike, or looking for Pimsleur Spanish Level V, whichever arrives most intact or smells better.

Pet service!

Are you where you want to be for the second wave? Just ask for Bonobo Bob's Devil's Kiss craft shrub cocktail.

But lovers of ear, nose and throat Dr. beware: Nuts for sale, updated.

Meanwhile, the best New York cheesecake in Cuenca arrives on cue via Nathaly Vivas, personal chef, food delivery, and her Four Types Of Motion Sensing Lights.

Cameron Kayce, massage therapist, is open for business and offers domestic cleaning of your Yali, if you have one. Services provided exclusively by Manual Manuel's Digital Manipulation Services.

Well! No cover.

For sale or rent: Ladder, aluminum, 5-step (three up, two down).

Fresh chickens, fresh roses, fresh red hot chilis. Fresh wife not included.

The Birds of Ecuador — Field Guide — hard to find. 740 pages $35. Free clues, but bring your own feathers and magnifying glass.

Two older Roku units, slightly impressionistic. Cranky on Thursdays. Will trade for specific aromas or a slightly used syllogism.

Bar stools, complete with shoe disinfection trays. Brand-new. Stay safe and clean while drinking.

Nuts sale. (Again.) No other information available during daylight hours.

Roasted pig delivery. El Jardín Restaurant — Ask for Hornado. Will perform tricks for donuts.

Even kids with chicken pox love hot dogs at The Good Life Cafe, but sourdough comes in different flavors and is mostly not contagious and can be fun as well if you have some imagination. No kids allowed.

Extreme desserts: Breads, Bagels, and Biscuits delivered to you in Cuenca from a modern house with small garden in gated community. Watch for snipers.

Fully furnished apartment, 13 BR — 12.5 baths. Near earth orbit. Remigio Crespo and Solano across from the fulminating giant tunafish. Tell them the virus sent you.

Which reminds us of something...Ah, yes...Covid-19 plasma donations gladly exchanged for expiring/expired visas. Extra credit if they smell like catnip, or you do, or are lickable.

That's all for now. Remember to brush your pants.

 


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Currently, me...Washing wheat the Wild West Way.