Friday, March 8, 2013

Advice

Plus a free suicide shower to our 47th still breathing attendee.

Hi. My name is Ken Ken. No, I'm not a double agent, or Barbie's gay companion male. I'm an expat, and I do everything double good.

My wife, Jane Jane and I moved to Ecuador, and we think we know a lot that you don't. Probably, is what I'm thinking.

Jane Jane thinks so too, don't you, Jane Jane? (She's nodding her head in agreement right now.)

So, since, aside from our names, we're pretty normal for pod people, we thought we'd offer to share our vast knowledge gained through eight months of living in a high-rise apartment with 24-hour security, eating in gringos-only restaurants, and getting crystal therapy while undergoing quantum massage.

Sound good?

OK, time for a disclaimer. I am not currently selling real estate or anything else, but I do have connections, in case. Think about it.

I'm sure you know how things work, and if so, please feel free to sign up for our weekly seminar, "Getting Real About Ecuadorian Real Estate".

Catchy name, right? Jane Jane and I think so.

And we like it here. We really, really like it here.

You might too. But you have to sign up to get the inside story. Seating is limited, and if you want a shot at the best properties, you really need expert advice. Remember, anyone who can sneak past the guards gets in free.

So, to sum up, this is just a friendly offer from two friendly people with friendly names to answer your typical newbie questions.

Questions such as: How to get here, how to find suitable properties, how to avoid the locals, who to bribe, and how to hire the best criminal lawyer after you try that bribing thing.

So give us a tootle via the internet and let's talk! (Jane Jane is nodding her head again.)

  • Ken Ken's and Jane Jane's Free Ride
  • Free advice on everything - Love offerings accepted at the door
  • Wednesday evenings, 7 p.m. to 9 p.m. at Big Ed's Red Colon Restaurant and Cleansing Station
  • See you there!
  • Email: KK&JJ-16@FourOneNine.com.ec
  • MagykJack: +539-209-21838
  • Address: 18 de Septiembre E 17 - 26 y 61 de Diciembre (Turn left at October and walk down Novenber - it's on the left.)


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