Starting next Thursday, Reflexology therapy is now available at Esther's Beauty Garage. Or will be next Thursday. At Esther's Beauty Garage. Next Thursday. Got it? At Esther's.
Esther is big on Reflexology. It's a thing. Reflexology resembles Plumbing Therapy®, in which a sensitive pudgy guy with a prominent butt crack thoughtfully massages your home's pipes to relieve leaks, squeaks, squawks, and creaks, without the inconvenience and associated high costs of having a plumbing license, business license, or anything other than a butch butt crack. Like Esther. She's butch too, Esther is, and she can reflex like crazy.
What is Reflexology anyway? It's a thing. That's about all anyone knows, so let's ask WonkyPedia. The WP knows all, eh?
- Reflexology is one of the most used alternative therapies in Denmark. (Wherever Denmark is, and does it actually count?)
- There is no consensus among reflexologists on how reflexology is supposed to work. ('K...Check.)
- Reflexologists posit that the blockage of an energy field, invisible life force, or Qi, can prevent healing. (Invisible! Qi? Quiche? Cheese? What?)
- ...no evidence found to support the use of reflexology for any medical condition. (Jeez — not again. Not this too...)
But a couple years back the Australian Government Department of Health & Stuff reviewed 17 alternative therapies to determine if any were worth paying for. Reflexology was in there but no one could figure out what it was, so at that point they all went out for cookies and beer.
All fine by us. If the cat lady down the block thinks it's a good deal, WTF then, I'm easy.
Come live the ultimate body care experience with Esther. Her reflexology massages will make you feel beautiful and healthy from the inside out. Different massages will make certain parts of your body feel a lot better.
Probably, especially if you catch Esther within a day or so after her monthly bath, and ask her for "The Special".
Do you want to try it? Just call Esther, she lived many years in the US and speaks English, so she'll be able to understand your needs.
Woof!
Bajada del Padrón 4-07 and Calle Larga, in front of Hostal Casa del Río. Monday to Saturday, 9 AM to 6 PM. Look for something resembling a garage. That will be Esther. Come prepared for a little friendly arm wrestling.
P.S.: How about a spring tuneup?
- Have your muffler probed for pests.
- Tinkle therapy by request.
Comments? Send email to hoofist@gmail.com
It may or may not help.